Tinderdestiny?

        

          Scheduled to meet up at the Stone Rose in Columbus Circle at 700, The Text comes " Hey can we make it 730"... "Hmm let me think about", I thought about it Ok. As is the case with most of my dates, She's crazy busy and running 10 to 15 minutes late.Under normal circumstances is not a lot of time, but when you're sitting alone at a lounge can seem like an eternity. Strolling in around Twenty minutes later, She was apologetic and mentioned she may need to take a couple of calls. Fun, Perky, Cute, and Bubbly. Her personality made her a lot more attractive. She compared Tinder to the N or R train, Where you just throw a bunch of random of people and see what you get. It Surprised me her longest relationship was Four Months, but that's"plenty of time to know weather its working or not".

 We went through family History, between her calls, and it turned out That her family and mine were very friendly growing up in the Machne Yehudah Section of Jerusalem from the 1940's  and have been in contact here also for a while, before losing track of each other. Not the Strangest thing that happened to her on Tinder, But a definite first, Probably a last as well.. Dropping her off home, I assuaged her fears about getting in a total strangers car, and it looked like a slam dunk to advance to the second round. We Exchanged some texts, mainly about our connection ,and she may have " overlooked" me asking her out again, and with that went away the dream of cutting down the nets, and a disappointing First Round Exit............ 

Jim Boehim,

             
         
                 Would be very proud to know His Zone has become the Official and Sanctioned Way of playing Defense in Jew Basketball. With Low tolerance to Traffic and Bad Basketball, I was very fortunate to get a heavy dose of both Driving out to LI to watch my Brothers 8th grade Haftr team play Flatbush in the Yeshiva finals. Literally Zoning out ( no pun intended) It was a Battle of the  Really Really Junk Defenses,. The Less Talented Haftr Team overcame a significant size advantage, and with a mix of Patience, going to the basket hard, and seldom turning over the ball, Were in control from Start to finish, and ran the Tables to a perfect 12-0 Season....... Eleven Years ago an Ex forced me to go out for Sushi om a Saturday night, causing me to miss  a classic and Epic St. Joes- OSU regional final. That Caused me to make the Second Serious Vow of my life, The first not to ever wear  white Gym socks with my Suit and the second to never miss a potentially great Regional final, Not unless of course i would be getting.....  unbeknown est to me , I was supposed to go to some lounge/ club and was responsible to be the ride for a couple of people. With people waiting for me, Hell would freeze over, Before i would miss end of the  KU- Irish Game. KU prevailed and I wind up spending the rest of my night  at a Fifth Ave club/ Lounge, listening to people excessively Whoooo, take way to many Selfies,  Dance like no one was watching, and being spat on by a half Yemenite girl, due to a bad case of  Hiccups. It left me  wondering were they really having a good time..........

Option C

   Was the Curvy " Jewess" from Riverdale. A Law Journalist, She had really and really  impressive Credentials. Animated , fun and really Way to Happy, she was Especially talented,  Appearing on an episode of American Greed, and currently Writing a Screen play. The conversation continued With a lot of " Yeaahhhh' and Definette's" and not those kind of "yeahhh", but for sure going well until She mentioned how the  Western Pa  Nuns "made her an offer, She couldn't refuse". Not to Join the covenant I hoped , but rather a Scholarship. In Israel their is a phrase the "Asimon Fell", Meaning pretty much "DUH".  I recommended her to still visit Israel, and she would really like to one of the Christian tours. "We should definite get together again".... both knowing what that really means.... . Out of Options,  after canceling on the Local Russian religious girl and the Buxom Czeque. I began Speaking to a girl online,not the good online, It was peculiar  how similar our backgrounds were, her father from a large Jerusalem family married an American from Far rockaway area, and moved to America. She was really pretty and and after a few lines exchanged Why not meet me up?........ 

Three "Roads Diverged

 in a wood and I, I took the one less Traveled by....... Are Options  always a good thing.? Knowing all to well that I could not juggle Three meetings with girls in one night, It became more apparent that I would be playing  " F- Marry- Kill" to determine what I should do. While That was going on in my mind , I couldn't help thinking, What a great world we live in, Where a guy like me can get Three count em Three Dates in one Night. Clearly is a mans world. The Convenient option was with the Russian young lady Who stood me up.  She's close by, Shes Attractive, and if things don't go well, It can end really early. The Logical option was the Endowed Czeque girl whom goes for the "tall. dark and handsome types. of course".  Not having any of those qualities, I replied at least "I'm Rich........ if i were living in Eritrea, leaving the last part out.  The last Option was the Jewess from Riverdale, Attractive  with curves , She was roughly my age, She loved Sports , and always wanted to visit Israel. Unsure of what to do and the heads and tails options not really available I chose too...... 

Matzah Practice

 Kicks in this week. Just want to acclimate myself to the dietary laws of the Holiday of Freedom......   Reprinted from the last Two Years  The Haforah of the Week " Machar Hachodesh" always reminds me of the great NBC Sports anchor Bruce Beck, who was so eager to cover the story of the Israeli windsurfer Gal Friedman winning  Israel's first ever  gold medal in Athens in 2004. Resorted to singing his Haftorah to the Israeli Authorities, to allow him into the Heavily secured Press area  to do an interview. " machar ha Chodesh"....http://www.jpost.com/Sports/Singing-for-Gal-Friedman........Something better did not come up for my Russian last minute cancelation date Wed Night, and she text me to  Reschedule, not very warm to the idea, but figuring why not See you Tuesday night... Unless of course something better comes up....Not sure if it was a narcissistic move or not, but Messaging an Apology to the girl I Ghosted on it Seemed like the right thing to do. I think she thought that it was, She didn't reply, I'm Glad to have had the final word at least......" The Rock, the Almighty, his work is perfect, for all his ways are Justice"?.........
 

Leaving

   A few minutes early for my 700 Date at Sheepshead bay, The text comes  "I hate myself for doing it, but we probably going to reschedule...... if you still up to meeting me"... Scrutinizing  the language of the text,even though she's Russian. Here is what I came up with -  She is going out with someone else tonight, She knows she's wrong for canceling 8 minutes before, but is trying to gain sympathy, and doesn't really want to meet up by asking that way.  For certain I  was pissed not because she canceled, but cause she was Russian;  naa she really did mess up other plans for me I replied, "No worries, Hope everything is OK, and maybe another time". We exchanged OKs and  probably deleted each other's numbers, at least i did hers. The realty of Today's dating something better comes up you jump on it, but at least be courteous and cancel before...... For some odd and unknown Reason, The TV and Internet in my Apartment goes down. Unclear on how to handle the crisis, I spent countless hours and time Speaking to Several Techs and Reps from Verizon. Three Days later a Tech Shows, Starts laughing. One of the coaxial cables were knocked out, 90 Seconds later Tubegalore is back again.....With  our predictions of a huge Likud win, Despite all the odds, the OB averted its " Dewey Defeats Truman" moment and
 

going AWOL

       for a couple weeks, left me clear to reflect, refresh and strategies my dating life. While on leave i did attend a very fun Birthday Party for a girl named  "Susie" as far as who the hell she was?  What the hell why Not.?  I knew some people going and figured to join. The Highlight of the night Should have been..... But I did get to meet Susie a really Fit and pretty hot early 40's Divorcee, we spoke a little and she rebuffed my friendship attempt. However it was especially gratifying to finally meet up with the young lady whom  once Referred to me as "Slow and Off", She of course had no recollection, but it gave me great pleasure to act stupid around her, after all I am Slow.  In My Defense She is no  aeronautical engineer, But probably a lot richer than any of them.........Kosher restaurant's continue to hijack their patrons with inflated prices, Crappy Service and total disregard for customer comfort. The reason  they CAN. Breaking bread with Mooch the Mrs and Brust and at a midtown Kosher eatery, I  would rather pay the city money in parking in tickets than the restaurant., but none the less bread was Broken, I had my First cigarette since Oct 2014..... I didn't inhale........

The Real Reason why Likud

 will form the next Government ? Could it be  "The Bradley Effect" of course referring to a Situation where people polled are scared to say who they Really are going to vote for. With all the vitriolic Rhetoric coming from every angle Attacking PM Netanyahou. I Still find it  hard to Imagine, That when it comes time to pull the lever in favor of " Bugi- Tzippy" ticket, People would have the guts to do it. The Israeli's  know Deep down that their is a  distinct correlation between concessions and Terror. Their greatest fears would to to reverberate back to the OSLO, and then the Expulsion of the Gaza beltway communities Days. However the real Reason Why the Likud Will form the next government? What is Because Perennial loser and inveterate schmer  Shimon Heres Endorsed the Labor party...........


 ,

"Ghosting"

         is the term, I learned from an old  Persian date of mine, where one party in a Dating Simply Disappears.  After some intense conversation That included some of my Favorite topics; Porn in particular, with a girl I've been seeing for the Third time, It was unclear weather we would be doing.....Choosing the road more traveled by these days, We both kind of  Disappeared on each other for a few days. She blinked first and messaged me That it was OK if I didn't feel the connection, Of which I said It's been a Rough week; it was. Some brief texts after and No Hurt, Harm, or Injustice on any side........ Realizing that It is Incredibly insipid to carry on Scores of conversations with a coterie of women, and trying to " figure out"when to get together, and then not following up, made me realize that Quick Fix online dating   have turned me into a worse person that I already am. I " Forget" about dates, I ignore and only to be fair also get ignored, and lost track of how many hours a week I waste playing this game....... Here is how I wish i can be more like My father. Going together to the Nets- Pelicans game with my 9 year old Nephew. He insisted it was OK for him to go under the turn style, Clearly wrong, but very funny. My Father is an Expert at getting a seat on the train, Doesn't matter if he let's people off first or squeeze into a technically Six Skinny person Bench on the train where their are five Fat ones. The Nets Were Embarrassingly bad and got blown out.........

Trained Like A Beudian

  Tracker, to Scour the Terrain  for dog doody,. For the first the first time in over 19 months, I failed at my job, Lucky for me their was a lot of puddles and snow on the ground.......... The Speech of  The Century, Was not even the Speech of the year, Not even sure it was the Speech of the month. Most Expected  BiBi  to hit  it out of the park like he did back in March 2011, but instead He settled for  A meek Harold Baines like infield Single. Despite not bringing anything new he did Accentuate and continued to put pressure on a bad deal with Iran. The Arab States had no problem living with an Alleged Nuclear Israel for over Forty Years, But have a major problem living with a Potential  Nuclear Iran for one minute......

















                       

ich ben Ein Berliner

      Trying to impress my German  Tinderdate, Tuesday night, I greeted her with that phrase, Unimpressed She did know it was Kennedy. Going through the usual Chit chat, She seemed   uncomfortable at some of my Jewish related Questions. Especially when asking if her family would be very upset if she ever dated or broke bread with a Jew, Not that we would ever date, but...... I cut down on the Jew Questions, and Focused more life in the Deutchland. A lighting Engineer, she was really smart, but I really didn't care, choosing to focus on the cleavage. Driving her home, only cause the weather was really crappy, I never believed that anything is a waste of time, But this was really a waste of time, As the only thing i learned was how to say Sh%$it in German, Would have taken me Two Seconds to Google it............An Evil Thought raced through my mind, As i was running Errands on the Snowiest Purim on Record. What if HAMAN really won the war, No one would be double parking or blocking traffic in the quest of exchanging Mishloach Manot,for g0d's Sake.  The downside would be that the Megillah Would not have a Happy Ending,... Just an Evil thought
                       

The NY JETS,

 is what my dating life has been become. Despite all the Preparations and Effort, I either manage to Mess up, get messed up and ultimately get Screwed or Not Screwed. Some Dates, Are complete blow outs, where from the start I know their is no chance. Many Others, I invest the time, Effort, Money and am practically knocking on heavens door , only to be told naa you can't come in, It's as if,  I invest my Sunday afternoons Watching the Jets, Seeing them comeback, look like their gonna win, and that in the end, have me cursing for Sitting through Three and half hours only to know that their gonna lose ........ In the Warriors code "their is no Surrender the Body Says stop, the spirit cries never". The great EEE was cruising and on record setting pace when he reached the Eight Mile mark  , in quest for glory in the short shorts,itchy a$$ division of the Disney Half Marathon. When suddenly  he began having Severe gas and blistering Knee pain . Where most runners would throw in the towel,  EEE Was determined to finish, and refused to give up trekking the last Five miles on Spirit, Heart and guts. A noted observer said  "He may have come in one of the last in the half Marathon race, but he came in first in the Human race". This was his True Derek Redmond Moment and for those who do not Know what that is i Highly recommend watching this water shedding 3 minute video   https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kZlXWp6vFdE..........