Blessed are the closers,

  it is they who shall  Open again..... With out much fanfare and friction the closing on the Apt ran a meager one hour and eight minutes.  I served as a buffer between my brother/attorney and RE girl, they laughed off their fight and were even somewhat complimentary of one another to the point of sitting together for a festive lunch.....It always happens I got suckered into renewing my membership online after being hot listed I emailed the portly pepperpot that favorited me , only to receive the usual non reply. perhaps she favored me by accident...... My profile is disconnected until further notice.....

The Road to Hell,

 is paved with good intentions....and with that Some official closure. Church on Sunday will not be  as PB girl has not called back, I reckon my unconventional gifts  to girls on dates don't seem to be making an impression. I hope she at least uses the Toothbrush.....Closing time Tomorrow, Their is no doubt in my mind their will be friction, I think i need to medicate myself I know my Brother is going to fight with someone Probably RE should be fun though...... A friend needs help this is not a solicitation i don't do that just putting it  http://www.haverim.org.il/e/funds/one_fund/163.htm ...According to AM the right side on this year Sunni V Shiite Bowl is Sunni Take SF - 3.5  Even- I bet Munster for 40 times.......

Church on Sunday?

   Unclear, But I am glad to have met up with PB girl, She was a little late  because i confused the Sony and Time Warner Building of which I profusely apologized for. It felt a little weird to be going out, and despite being  some what nervous things went well, and my greatest fears were not realized thanks to the magic of Imodium capsules. Their was a lot to talk about the NRA and the Tea party  and my Persian line of  "Sir get over here" failed to impress though she was that I watched the show "Ask The Prime Minister"Of which i labeled it wrong. A Toothbrush ( at least she should have a story) and a couple hours later i dropped her off, as usual i got the "had a great time and would love to go out again", but that's what's usually said on camera, but behind the scenes who knows......... The Dakar The Israeli Submarine disappeared off radar forty five years ago 69 Sailors perished.........

On the Coldest

    day of the year i sympathized with a car  and couldn't imagine something worse than having you're passenger window smashed, that is until i got to my car and found my driver window smashed. I felt like OJ with my bloody hands clearing the glass off  the seat, the booty around Eight dollars in quarters the cost $487.47, as always I'm Optometerstic and will not allow the terrorists to win.....PB girl has postponed on me twice so far, it's not really bothering me though maybe she really is BUSY will shoot for another day.......All the Israeli Party's that placed in the 19th Knesset Celebrate as if they got into the NCAA  the Seeding of course Irrelevant..... The Only good news for me that is That the Shas Moroccan Troika of the Deri, Attias, and Yishai don't have leverage in forming any govt and essentially putting an end to their parasite methods.....

Shiite V Sunni

   is what this Year Superbowl to me is. I loathe the Harbaughs and could care less who wins, a real waste of a football season. Non the Less in the Spirit of the Superbowl I will make the Rabbi Willie Agus joke I went to see the Harbough bowl someone told me Harbough won so I left ( he uses the kramer v Kramer).... Nice to see Jews being represented well in the AFC championships a couple of owners and the head referee.....With that last floating pass (I'd assume he was going for a hook and lateral) Matt Ryan of the Falcons broke Jeff George's Falcon record for passing yards in a playoff game, Why didn't the shit%head throw the Hail Mary. Reminded me of the time Golden State Forward Tom Tolbert Went in for an uncontested lay-up at the buzzer his team was down Three......Happy MLK day, Our Mayor Mayor Sh$^%head also makes a huge deal out of this day closes everything but still doesn't allow you to park.......  

Both Chuck Norris

  and Donald Trump  Endorse BiBi Netanyahou in the Upcoming Erections in Israel, Therefore by process of elimination we have decided to follow and also Endorse PM Netanyahou as well http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SwqTY1oJcjs   http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tm5Je73bYOY

......Running into the great DS has encouraged me to finally send out a letter, I thanked him for some helpful tips...... Despite playing around on line mostly out of boredom and distraction, No to any setups though........ I am amazed though that girls actually do read the profiles another nice email from a cute 30s girl in NJ  -Ma Koreh? I have to tell you, you seem like a pretty funny guy. I read your profile and was hysterical. It was refreshing considering many people have the same generic profile in which I will admit I probably do too but never tried to make it transparent. Hope your having a great day.
Nicole - she doesn't speak Hebrew just knows a couple of words i think I emailed her back mainly in Hebrew.... My Membership Expires at the end of the month and I will for certain not be renewing so no need to rewrite a new Profile i may have posted it before
I always wished to be the guy you're mother warned you to stay away from, but i have no tatoos, piercings, do drugs or smoke, hardly ever drink and never been part of a gang not of course you count Bnie Brith. MY grandmother thinks i'm handsome and I am wildly popular amongest the geriatric crowd. I am optometersitc, rather than looking at the glass half full or empty i view is as "Spillith over" ( if youre scoring youre psalms at home its the 23rd). I Observe Obscure Holidays, Create words, fluent in foreigh language profanity, and learned spanish from reading the bathroom walls in my warehouse. My best quality is my memory and that I am always on time( my mom is asheknaz) my Worst is the my Spelling. If i didn't love my family and my friends, the real ones FB ones don't count for me not unless I ever win the Lotto in which i promised to share the winnings with them- I would be a big creepo- Overall I am a normal. ok relatively normal, responsible ( mortage and all bills are paid in [...]advance) and fun...... Have great rest of the day [^]

Gonxhe Bojaxhiu?

 

    What is the real name of  Mother Teresa.. This of course being an email I received from an Albanian Girl referring to my Ideal match of  "Hanna Senesh and Mother Teresa" in a Hot Body. Gonxhe Means Rose or flower This Justifies my 39.99 membership..........Giving the Benefit of the doubt PB girl called me back, Her accent is great and we scheduled to go out Monday night, I guess I will follow EEE and others advice to get myself together and stop moping around, Still doesn't feel right even after 37 days.......The pretty Non Bar Rapheli Israeli Girl "Hey , how r you ? At the airport on the way to NY ... " Not to bad thanks have safe flight and left her my Number.......The Big Jelly Slogan " We Always Have Change".........

Most girls

 On Jdate are either Reform or Culturally Jewish. In Certain respek when I tell them That I am Traditionally observant it's as if I fell off the moon kind of like you put on that Tefillin Sh%it.  So like what any other normal guy would do, I downplay my Observance for a possible chance of getting some. According to the Elias Bureau of Statistics that's never worked for me yet. However a Lovely slightly older woman contacted me who happens to be Baal Tshuva, So just like any good ole Jew I mentioned  that I attend Torah Classes etc.. Again not a Lie But a Terminal Inexactitude the Rabbis Speech in shul theoretically is a Torah class.... PB girl Emailed me apparently i was inarticulate when i left her my number, maybe she also couldn't read my Typed Email when i sent it to her via the net, ( the benefit of the doubt )  cause she never called me- its only been Two days though, I lost interest Id imagine she did too.......For Some reason all guys that wear a scarf with out jackets just over their shirts or Suits are Obnoxious I ran into someone that I knew yesterday,  and it just hit me That i know at least four People like that; all Obnoxious......Commending EEE on his dauntless, stalwart and doughty actions ,Leaving his friends in a card game to go protect his family from an intruder who knocks on peoples doors asking for Fifteen Dollars - A true wind beneath the wings moment.... I lost as usual by the way......


  

As in Previous

      years I will be rooting against the State of Israel in the Oscars  Surprise surprise they have TWO Nominations this Year. Both made by draft dodging Arab pandering leftists. They have a great shot of winning their vociferously anti-Israel. "Five broken cameras" and the "gatekeepers" they make previous nominations  like "Walz with Bashir"look like Sunday School teachers......... one of the shuls i go to on Saturday nights for Evening prayers I found it odd that the Rabbi just walks around or talks the whole prayer sans the Amidah I am still giving him the benefit of the doubt........"Hey, Your profile blub made me laugh but you look kinda mean in your pictures." - I thanked her for complementing me for looking mean, and not ugly but assured I wasn't mean. I told her Photos were very pretty even  though  i didn't really think so. No reply back so far.......I have no money on the Ravens- Broncos game but really hope Denver wins So at the very least Munster would pissed.......

True Story,

  
  and not to steal a bit out of Richord Pryors Stand-up. I get an urgent phone call Someone I did Business with down South who had a large pawn shop, in his mid Fifties was having Sex with a 20 something year old Prostitute had a heart attack and died according to the prostitute "He came and Went at the Same time"...... Kaddish for my hair it feels like my hair has cancer and it's getting less and less everyday to the point of death, perhaps not the best Metaphor to describe the hairy  situation,but then again I'm not the best at this......"How can You miss me? I'm the fat  guy with the orange Longhorns t-shirt under neath the basket"- Sparing myself Further Humiliation I just walked off the court. The Kids playing at the center have got to be the most selfish offense and defense players perhaps ever......PBG ((pretty British girl) emailed me back with her email and number I sent her an email and then left a message.........I can't seem  to shake this Melancholy mode I have been in lately, They say drinking room temperature water helps- then again who the hell is They.......Alouf 's Haredy School raffle is back, I'm guessing they really need money, They are allowing spending the winnings at the shermootas.......

No News is,

good news. Remembering how the game is played leave it up to the girl to say no or yes, I must say I don't mind it one bit that their was no reply...........The  SHAS party in Israel, Which represents the Sephardic Haredy population has the Monopoly on the portions in the world to come or Olam Habaa. Weird to see them rescind  notable Rabbi Amnon Yitzhak's Portion his crime  Running in the upcoming Elections......... One of my best Emails I got from a pretty  British girl living in the city  "I figure you're a little more observant than I am, but I thought it would be remiss of me if I didn't let you know how funny your profile was. This Jdate thing can be exhausting at times but at the very least, I wanted you to know you put a smile on someone's face.".  I was very complimentary in response, Her response "                                                             ...................AFTER CHANGES UPON CHANGES WE ARE MORE OR LESS THE SAME RIP Sammy Franco a notable figure from the center. Thanks to DM for notifying me.We went to the funeral to Honor the legend. DM suggested they name something in the center after him........The  Fuzz are desperate, A cop on Ave P bangs on my window asking me if i had my seat belt on,and when he saw that it  was he proceed to ask if i had just put it on. Does the Flatfoot think I am an idiot of course it was on and even if it wasn't would I tell him and be an enabler supporting his doughnut addiction........A Special HBD to President Richard Nixon, The man who helped avert the destruction of the Third Temple......

 

 

 

Another thing to add

to My resume of What I learned from Previous relationships that Included Never ever wear white gym socks with a suit, That the Yemenites were the first to drain the swamps near  the Sea of Galilee, and Turkish, is the Distinct Difference Between Halabi and Shami. While Dealing with a customer/ vendor I wont mention weather he is Halabi or Shami, he insists I BIllivme that he only makes a Ten cents on me, and that every product I have, he paid or has it for much cheaper, amongst other things. Clearly a valuable lesson but not quite on the socks level........Comedian Artie Lange- Look alikes:: Former Met and Expo Great  Rusty Staub and the Girl married to Cynthia Nixon
 I lent someone 2 dimes at the End of May, I'm Scared S%hitless to ask her when she's going to pay me back

Forgetting how

The game is played I recieved an email from an aquiantence "I might have a girl for you look her up and if your interested i'll see if she is available xxxxx-xxxxxx ,  nice girl. Let me know".  Still not feeling up to it I suggested in a couple weeks maybe, Thinking It'll all be forgotten, "Any Update on xxxx-xxxxxx? What the hell why not, Ok Let me check with her then and I'll get back to you, I dont fear this kind of rejection to much ........EEE thinking he's funny tried setting me with a girl named Candy Lickme, i played along. I forwarded him a photo of a girl i once knew his response let's just say he  was very impressed  here is how he advised me  to get her:
EEE: so go for her! Tell her u have big bucks and she doesnt have to know the truth knightiu: so lie to her face that u are rich EEE: what do u have to lose KnightIU: haha she knows im not rich EEE: tell her u made a windfall from a huge deal or someone died and left u a fortune KnightIU: hahah KnightIU: u think it will work KnightIU: serious what are my chances EEE: 78% KnightIU: how do u asses that EEE: because she is a pure bimbo and will believe anything.   EEE: After boning her, tell her yyyyy is rich and get him boned KnightIU: she's smart she went to college like the strippers u saved from paradise EEE: ah! I got it! EEE: tell her u have a friend who can get her a job at Ricks or Flashdancers! EEE: she will bone u in a second KnightIU: which friend EEE: me! EEE: tell her she has to bone u first KnightIU: i wish KnightIU: you give the best advice EEE: i always did. You'd be married by now if u ever listened

The Big Jelly,

 organization has took on a new Sponsor " Irwin" from the Swing  State of Florida. BJ which will have it's grand opening by the End of January, Unfortunately will not be able to provide the same Discounts to family and friends and hot girls as prior........ Random  Running into Five People that Seems like  I haven't seen forever Cantor Extraordinaire Joe Mooseri highlighted the the crew, he was with his wife and didn't attempt to hit me.......The Upcoming Israeli Elections have become outrageously ugly, the attacks have become so vicious I can't imagine a coalition ever being formed.....My Niece asked me where i was going for vacation,  I told her Gehenom, She wanted to know if it's hot there and if you can go swimming..... Strange but true ( 11-10-10) One incident that happened to me was I was picking up this girl that i had been set up with it, things didn't seem right from our phone conversation and also the fact that she insisted on meeting somewhere on the corner and didn't want me to pick her up from her house seemed odd- I picked her up and usually on blind dates I like to give the option weather to go locally or in the city- We settled on Bay Ridge- under 50 minutes later i had her back on the same corner that i picked her up- i beat the Israelis when they invaded and left Entebbe by a few minutes. She had to say "good-bye to her friend who was moving to Florida" that night -I made certain that she would get there with plenty time to spare..... She friended me on FB we may meet up for a drink?.....

Ready to Pull the Plug

 and  mail in the stats.  After one week of resigning up the numbers are not very flattering,  A couple hundred views, some flirts including some from Israeli girls, a couple of older woman,and ones from  an African American girl and a Chinese girl both willing to convert. A few Emails Exchanges that stalled for good reason, A couple of numbers which i just didn't bother calling, and that Israeli Girl seemed to disappear. One Russian girl left and it's closing time. I wonder how i would do if  I emailed all the girls i was thinking of, but I am petrified of  rejection, someone pointed that out to me but i always laughed her off........After 23 days of not having gone out, I think it's time, I just haven't been in much of a mood hopefully this wont last  as long as the Omer period.....

With Great Pleasure,

i can report that I failed on everyone of my 2012 Resolutions, "........ Some Resolutions for 2012  Personal:  To Eat A lot Less, To Curse a lot  less, to Grow Balls, To learn how to say NO, Appreciate people more, become Approachable, Work Harder and more Efficient, and  to Discontinue the Blog..... The Conclusion according to Israeli President Shimon Heres " We need more Solutions not Resolutions"( a repeat quote).......Terminal inexactitude - was a term  first used by Winston Churchill its sort of a Lie- Like i have an engagement Party tonight, was my excuse to not going to meet up with my sort of friend, i just never specified if I will be going.....

Happy New Years.....

          After inquiring about NYE Events, A friend Suggested I come to a party that she was going to, She thought i was serious about Wearing a Tux, and didn't respond to the fact that I told her I was vulnerable and she can take advantage of me. The Festive mood didn't hit me, and wind up just babysitting for my Nephews.......A While ago I was receiving Emails from Girls From Israel that were insanely hot some even resembled Bar Raphaeli and Ashley Dupree, Full of confidence and thinking i was good looking my world collided when I came to the realization of the harsh truth that they just wanted me for a Green Card. Fast Forward I am in contact with a pretty Israeli Girl on line, the good news is she doesn't look like Bar rapaheli the bad of course is she doesn't look like her either, But she is pretty and Will be here in Mid January......Staying on the Israeli Theme, There is a sort of friend from Israel here, She happens to be a real nice girl, and after meeting her for about an hour in the later afternoon yesterday, Iv'e been trying to avoid her like  the plague, I feel horrible that shes here all alone, But..........