" Only Success,

 

    are to be celebrated, you don't celebrate failures, and that has been Policy for over 25 Years..... A colleague who cut barley a cm of my hair, Clearly knowing the Policy, was irritated at the fact that It's Just as much My right NOT  to participate in my own Birthday Observances, as it was his Right to Participate. To paraphrase the late Lesley Sue Goldstein " It's my party, I can Cry if I want to"...... Twenty Five Pushes per minute is what i calculated pushing my daughter on the Swings.......A Friend got Stuck on Ocean Parkway, and needed a Saw to cut the Metal Bumper stuck to his Tire. I drove by to the nearest Hardware, Where I Mistakenly Purchased and Electric Saw for $87.78   Instead of a hand held one. With Brick and mortars struggling, I decided to Just keep it, perhaps for a future horror film. A  trouble maker friend from Yemen and purveyor of Fake news , came by and began excoriating me for paying so much, he could get the same one for $10. The fact Checkers did not Exactly Validate his account, However when seeing it for $27.99 + additional savings I knew The Store pulled a fast one me, However what bothered me more was when looking at the package, there was a $65.99 sticker on the package...

WHY DO PEOPLE

 

      feel compelled to be NICER to Rich people?, to Laugh Harder at their Jokes, greet them like  conquering Heroes?..... A Regular looking Shlub Walked into The Big J to have a Vacuum Serviced, while Entertaining him and treating ordinary , We had a good exchange, Upon hearing after about His Stature, Eminence and opulence, We  lamented that we didn't treat him Extra ordinary.......Parking has been pretty bad on the UES, That's why it's always helpful to share intelligence with the Doormen, and porters to increase the odds of finding spots. When fortunate to land a good spot, I text my doorman, He always responds by calling me SIR, aside from Loathing that title, I don't know how to respond back, I usually Don't............Stat of the week 108 Minutes over the past Three Nights, to find ANY spot... A GREAT idea by a guy who Sends me Brooklyn apartment Rentals on a daily Basis, let me be clear this is His idea and I am just a messenger to the 3 people this may come across their Screens. HAZANIDOL, a contest for the youth to be Judged by the prominent cantors of the community, That would not only raise money for good causes, but give opportunities to the Youth to contribute, while winning cash prizes........

 

Pragmatism

 

  Dictates that During Difficult times, You make due with the best of the Situation. Attending Services for the first time in Six months, this was the protocol. Prior to entering the Building you are questioned by an Israeli TSA style agent who checks you're name, and asks about you're whereabouts for the past couple weeks. Upon clearing that hurdle, is  a Quick Temperature check, then being escorted to a waiting elevator ushering you to the 9th floor Terrace for services.... It was calming that it was an open Service with Seats Spaced out to regulations. Masks were enforced and Except for  the cantor, and few from the group that rhymes were Spomoccans everyone was pretty much compliant.... Paying $300 for Nose bleeds, it didn't matter as it was more of a general admission. I Sat in the back, naturally next to the perianal throat clearer.  The Opening up cantor Eager to impress brought his Extra Special Holiday Show Tunes, My ONLY Issue Was the Excessive dragging out of the prayer, that it was really cold, The Uncomfortably of the Masks, and the Anxiety of still being in Closer distance with people....The Main act followed up, and read the crowd and situation well and finished in good time.... The Rich people really love to purchase the last Alliyah to the Torah ( Maftir), and they clearly deserve it for the amount of Cheese they spend, However They Should be Barred from actually reading it  and allowing the cantor to do so, on a Short Portion it took him an Extra 7 Min 33 Seconds.........

According to the

  Russians, One who doesn't ring in the new Year celebrating, Wont be celebrating the whole year...Hmmm..... A Mea Culpa, After several years of mimicking an acquaintance on Personal Hygiene.   Even to the point of sending people to Shake his hand, a long and overdue Apology is necessary.  Much Like Noah Who was Mocked and derided for telling people Gd would destroy the earth, he blew the whistle on Hand shaking, A concept that will probably become Obsolete....  Quoting Tesla  " Well the Sign Says", that face masks must be worn at I and D, The Hubris of  Some Fleimeshe  to adhere to that rule? It bothered me a little, Wait actually a lot otherwise, I wouldn't it note it here. Seems like a basic concept of RESPEK... The Rebuttal, maybe they had gotten it already and had the antibodies, maybe they couldnt afford one, and my personal favorite At a Jewish store they don't need to wear one, if it was a shoprite, bank, or  Bodega, then they should wear the mask to "avoid desecrating G0ds name". I saw something, But didn't say Something........Dean Smith Always Meant what he said, But Didn't always Say what he was thinking, So with that in mind, .L' Shana Tova   ,(          ) The L' of course is a testament to My late Grandmother...

Superstition!

     Today is the 189th day of this "Situation" that is 6 months and nine days, May the good.........Through out this Pandemic, I have implemented Some Unwritten rules for myself, that I follow religously for instance I never lay out my clothes at night for work the next day, avoiding certain places and shops for no apparent good reason, Always Always reading Pslam 70 before going to sleep, and Adding an Extra Spill of water, from Three to Four on my hands Every Morning........The Famous Saying in the Arab world is "It Doesn't matter who votes, What matters is who counts the votes" and here in the Good ole USA, we are headed in a similar direction. How the Heck can't we figure out  how to stop meddeling by other countries, How we can  make sure Absnetee ballots are processed properly, and making sure people don't vote several times, and the actual processing of all the votes. EVERYONE knows this now, Why can't figire it out before HellEction Day...... Wev'e become a ONE issue voter; The Pandemic ........The Central Issue in our apartment Upgrade was..... A Second Bathroom, for an additonal $1100 a Month was it worth it? We resooundly vetoed that resolution citing that Since we have moved, we only had Three serious bathroom overlapping Issues, Twice for Number #1 and once for #2, and were able to manage the crisis succesfully, Even if it meant peeing in the Bottle............

 

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