Congratulations

  to DM and the YDE thunder on an improbable championship run. DM was the Jerome Moiso ( Rick Pitino's Diff maker) in all Three Victories, This is a classic " Noah was a Righteous Man " Scenario.......Israel is Blessed with four Seasons Spring, Summer, War and Helections. In the Much Hyped Heavy Weight Match-up the results came back with a Disappointing Draw. The Torah Sages Campaign promises of " Olam Habaa" or a portion in the world to come, Brought out Thousands of Voters that have ensured that King BiBi will continue to reign over the Kingdom of Judea........ Is a Yarmulke something Holy? Anytime A Yarmulke is on the floor I make a concerted effort to pick it up, It's still unclear Why?........... "Anybody Here seen my Old Friend Martin"? (04-04-68)........ For how long is it permissible to park in a business lot, With out violating G0ds Laws? TD Bank parking lot is always full, full of patrons running errands elsewhere. Does that constitute Theft or is it Similar to just helping yourself to some nuts from Store Displays?.......Special. Events to  look forward to in the next couple of weeks  Persian Parade, May Day, and the Weed parade

Thank G#)D .....

   

       Over the Weekend, Our USPS driver, Delivers Boxes to the close by Storage and shipping Facility. Seems like a win-win situation for everyone, he gets to unload freight and I can get the boxes quicker, That is until a Pipe burst at the Storage Place and Lucky for me I had Two large boxes on the Front line of the Water Rush. Leaving the Place I Thanked  my Creator, Lord and Savior that I didn't receive more Boxes on that Fateful day. I thanked the Storage manager for his help, and as I was leaving he called out " Laniado, Wait you have more Boxes". And Sure enough I got 4 more boxes and how fortunate was I that they were all on the front lines,  perhaps they weren't killed, but really looked like they went through Hell. Not to Sound like an apostate, or a heretic, I wanted to renege on my Thanks to G#)D, I thanked him for preventing it from being worse, and it turned out worse than worse... I know I know...........When one parks on the Street and does Not Put Coins in the Meter is it Stealing?........ WHAT IS  "WHATS DOING"?  The Most popular Greetings utilized by Syrian women......

Should We

                have been grateful to having  felt -10 Degrees in NYC while residents of the Midwest were Feeling -50.  Does that put things into Perspective? Comparing the Weather to Life, That even though we don't exactly have it good, We should be grateful for what we got ?.......... Stat of  the day It Takes One Minute Twenty four. Six Noine Seconds to ride up the Escalator at the 86th Street Subway Station......For the past couple weeks I've been attending the Chabad Synagogue on Shabbat. The Torah Reading is like the NFL Draft, After Each reading Portion the Rabbi gives a speech about the reading, for the first Three Portions, The sermon is roughly 10+ minutes and around 5 minutes after till the 7th Round. It takes over an hour, and the message is usually the same.....The draw to the Minyan is that former Stern Show Whack Packer Ellegant Elliot Offen.  Having Previous Run ins with  "Eleganta", I wished him a Good Shabbos, and was Shocked that he remembered it was me who was Screaming out to him while he was runs on the Upper East Side. Raucously, He berated me for " having marbles in my mouth" and that I should not Harass him while he's running in G STRING LINGERIE RIGHT, The Poor Rabbi got into between fearing a confrontation  He accepted my Apology, and perhaps an Invite for a Sabbath Dinner......

On The Coldest

    Day of the Year, would you jump out of your car to chase loose Bills Blowing in the Below Zero Winds?  Unclear where the bills were coming i gathered  $22 ( 1 ten 2 fives 2 ones) , with out a clue of whom they belong, I asked the inebriated Russian guy if it belonged to him, as he was too busy chasing the rest of the Money. The local Stores seemed puzzled by my question, I wanted to leave a note with my number, but that seemed odd, and really unfair to the poor sap whose number I would have left ......Once again BJ T.V. erred going to the wrong women's March in NYC. Too much Estrogen, or perhaps Anti- Semitism lead to a split in the movement, We were by Columbus circle, the real action was by Foley Square..... A Commercial van  Hit me in the back at a low speed on the corner of McDonald ave and Ave P, Feeling the Jolt,  I went outside to survey any Potential Damage, The Perpetrator threw up his hands Gesturing " What " with out even offering a simple apology. Fortunately he understood the foreign language profanity i hurled his way..........

Does it make

          me a bad Person, When I don't rejoice in others Success, as a matter of fact not only do I Not  rejoice, but i am aghast, belligerent, makes my blood boil, that leads into a Foreign Language profanity laced Tirade when someone beats me to a parking spot........Signs of aging, While on the left coast I kept nudging my Be throed on How expensive Gasoline was........Uber is the way to go out there its significantly cheaper than NYC, the drivers seem eager to help, especially this one driver of " Turkish" Descent who wasn't aware of any of the Turkish references i made to him, Was telling us Which areas were the nicest, The cleanest, the Richest people live and Where they block off streets specifically for their holidays or whatever.  Studying computers, all his professors were also a certain way, and he was simply amazed by it. He Even had some of them as friends. Made for a really comfortable ride, Especially when my wife told him we were Jewish.................

A few Hours

 into 2019, is it over yet. Feels like that  Long  un air conditioned ride in a Brown Station Wagon  With a Few Miles Behined us  and Ten thousand More to go (JT).......... Some Observations about the Greater Los Angeles Area. Despite The Beaches and Warm Weather, people are just about as Fit as I am or some Shlub in the Midwest. Traffic is not Exactly NYC Traffic, but none the less pretty Bad, the Only Difference No One Honks! Through Thirteen Uber Rides over our Three Day Stay a total of 4 Honks Were registered. With all the Hype Given to Global warming and all, One would think that Recycling, Composting etc would be a top Priority for the Bright Red State!. To The Chagrin and outrage of my bethrothed, Even in the Upscale areas, Recycling is a Rarity and finding one of those Special Recycling Garbage Cans in the Streets is like Spotting Hasadeems at a Strip Club. As Good Guests to the city, We did our part in conserving Water, Even with the Extra Fifteen Minute Plus Showers, But Seems the Locals know how to beat the System, And on a final Note The Getty Museum is  not only highly Reccommened, For its Collections, Culture, Gardens and Views, but a really fun Tram Ride up to the Museum and Well made Peanut Butter and Jam Sandwiches, An LA Bargain at $5 a Pop.........

A Couple Weeks

             
    after Israel, and My Ears Still felt like My Touchis: Clogged!  At the insistence of my Betrothed, I decided to see the Dr, The ENT  That is an  not the latter. After getting the All clear, and wanting to rule out other things, He Suggested I go for a hearing Examination, Where i would be wearing these sound Proof Headphones in a booth and repeating  Words after the Middle Aged Heimeshe Style woman Proctor. Most  words were Antonyms and I did have to remind myself to Repeat and not Associate, for Example She would say Cold Then Hot then Wet then Will leave it at that...... A round of Congratulations are in order to a couple of acquaintances on the Engagements of their Sons. I was able to spend a combined  49 minutes 46:34 Seconds at both functions before Anxiety Set it.To Break it down one was 31:02:25 and the other 18:44:09 the Mrs was only able to attend one... My Father told me when People take Nuts, Candy or Olives from Open Areas in a supermarket, the Store's configure it into their Prices, and its not really Stealing. What he did not tell me was How Germ infested and dirty their hands are when they do it. So when Really craving Olives from the Pomegranate Olive Bar, the Patron  ahead of me, decided to  stick his hands and  taste which olives he wanted, with out making a decision at the end. Compelled, I inconspicuously  followed him up and down the aisles listening to him coughing, The Good news was that he was not covering his mouth, So Maybe it was really OK to get the Olives..............